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Stress is a Choice

Stress is chosen-not something that happens to you. How you react to that proposition is likely an indication of how you handle life’s ups and downs. Those who believe stress is nearly impossible to avoid find they are in stressful situations routinely. But those who believe they can choose their reactions to a situation often find their lives are less stressful.

Let’s say you’re on your way to an important meeting when a traffic accident occurs, instantly slowing the flow and forcing you to creep along the freeway. In that moment, if you automatically deem the situation to be negative then it’s likely you’ll be frustrated, upset, and stressed. But if you view the situation as neutral, you recognize that these types of things are simply out of your control-you realize that your reaction to the accident is what’s within your control, and you choose to be peaceful, then you will have a stress-free ride to your meeting.

So simple, yet so difficult to do when we’re actually in a situation like that.

I’ve read many books about how to handle stress, how to diminish it, and how to escape its ill effects-most of the time stress is talked about as though it were the flu and people have to hope and pray they don’t catch it. Stress is often seen as something that’s floating around in our world and if you’re not very careful it’ll attack you.

I used to view stress that way. But I’ve adopted a new attitude about stress. I view stress as a chosen reaction to circumstances and therefore if I choose to I can elect to have a different reaction.

It’s amazing the power our mind has over the experiences we have in life. I recently visited Chama, New Mexico for business and pleasure. While I was there I thought a lot about what a stress-free lifestyle these people must have. After all, how stressful can life be when you live in a tiny town with wide-open fields and so few cars on the road that traffic congestion would be seeing five cars backed up on the double-lane road into town? (Okay, for those addicted to fast-paced living that thought alone probably creates stress for you!) But my point here is that it’s not the environment that creates the stress-it’s the way we choose to see our environment and circumstances. If you believe that you can only relax and be stress-free in the country, in a hot tub, while getting a massage, etc. you’re setting yourself up for limited moments of stress-free living. Instead, if you realize that even in situations and environments that most would deem stressful you can choose peace, then your mind will take you to those stress-free places even during intense moments of chaos. Your mind is so powerful that you can think your way out of a stressful situation. The problem is that’s not normal or common in our society.

Most people are so used to dealing with stress that subconsciously they bring more and more stressful situations into their lives. They talk about the problems in their lives, the negativity, and all the things they don’t want. Then, as though they beckoned it into their lives, those problems and negative and stressful situations increase. You’ve heard this before: focus on what you want to get bigger-the problem or the solution. People who make valiant efforts to live stress-free, talk incessantly about the positive things in their lives, what they have to be happy about, and the good they are creating every day.

It’s that simple; and while it certainly may be easier to practice this when you’re on vacation or in a place that you typically view as stress-free, bringing home the skill to choose your reaction to all situations will empower and enrich you to live stress-free no matter where and what is happening in your life.

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  3. En-Joy the Holiday! (or ANY Day)
  4. Just Another Reason Not to Worry
  5. Bring on the Change

About the Author

Phoebe Chongchua is an award-winning journalist. She's a former ABC affiliate News Reporter/Newscaster who founded Live Fit Magazine in 2004, recognizing how the journalism industry is rapidly moving online. She's the owner of LiveFitFilms.com, an entertainment video storytelling company that produces video news stories for businesses and documentary films. In 2010, she launched ThePlantBasedDiet.com, a video site that helps people learn more about eating plant-based meals. The site also features recipes and fitness exercises. Phoebe is a keynote speaker. Her popular keynote: Take Out the Trash! helps audiences lighten their emotional baggage. Known as the Worriless Living Mom, Phoebe shares with audiences techniques for reducing worry, stress, and anxiety from her book, If the Trash Stinks: Take It Out! She helps people Take Out the Trash by dumping their mental and emotional garbage so they can make room for opportunities and treasures in their lives. Phoebe incorporates her passion for Pilates in her keynotes and seminars and always gets the audience up out of their chairs and on the floor with her exercising. Phoebe's writing appears in several books and publications including RealtyTimes, BizyMom's Expert Corner, and several newspapers. Phoebe’s writing is featured in TRUMP: The Best Real Estate Advice I Ever Received, The Complete Idiot’s Guide To Buying Foreclosures. She's the co-author of, Five Steps to Freedom: How to Cut Your Dependence on Institutions and Escape Financial Slavery. Her latest book, released Fall 2010, No Worries! 5 Steps to Peace, Even in Chaos. View her work at FinallyNoWorries.com

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